Wednesday 13th January 2016. Today’s challenge was to “do something new”. Well that “something” that I did was to take my son to a baby group called Music Bugs.
In my previous blogs I briefly touched upon the subject of my loss of confidence when Charlie first arrived. I really wanted to be confident enough to take him to baby groups but I feared being judged and compared by other mums – I really can’t explain where this fear came from. I just felt that I wouldn’t be as good as the other mums and wouldn’t fit in. What if they are bitchy? What if they are competitive? I was already feeling pretty low and I didn’t want to risk feeling out of place.
But recently I have started to grow in confidence, and just decided that Charlie and I have as much right to go to these groups as anyone else does. It will do Charlie the world of good to interact with other children and be in a different environment. So I decided to suck it up and go to Music Bugs.
The class was at 12:45, for 45 minutes. Now usually I give Charlie his dinner/lunch at 12:30-1pm, so I had a dilemma – feed him before at 12 or feed him late at 2pm. I opted for 12pm. Charlie had his nap at 11am, he woke at 11:45 and I had his dinner all ready for him – I felt so organised. We needed to leave at 12:20 so plenty of time. But Charlie had other plans – obviously – it’s impossible to plan with a baby! I sat him in his high hair and he was just refusing to open his mouth! He was kicking his legs and making a lot of “uh uh” noises. Then, he turned beet root red – yes, he was having a poo! He must have strained about 10 times! (Sorry for the tmi). So I took him up and changed him. Then back downstairs to try again! Nope! He still wasn’t having it! Then, he did another poo!!!! Clearly the first one was just a warm up! And although he had only eaten half of his dinner, he somehow managed to get it all over his top. So it was upstairs again for another change, then it was time to leave!
We actually got there early, which I was very proud of! I think I even managed to walk in looking calm and collected! And I have to say Music Bugs was great! Charlie was a little uncertain about the loud music and the instruments at first, but after a while he realised that he could chew on them and was happy to just watch all the other people in the room. We sang songs, clapped our hands, played with tambourines, maracas, balloons, there was a bubble machine, it was great! Very overwhelming for Charlie but I think going every week will do him good. I’m really glad that I took him.
As for the other mums everyone seemed lovely, some of them have been taking their children for a long time. Nobody came over to say hello to me though and I didn’t have the confidence to go introducing myself, they already seemed to know each other and were happy chatting amongst themselves. There was a nice woman next to us who tried to make Charlie smile when he was being a little grumpy.
Hopefully if we go each week we will make some friends. The main thing for me is that Charlie gets to experience something new, and hopefully with time his confidence will grow – and his mummy’s too.