Family life, Lifestyle, mummy blog, Parenting, parenting blog, Toddler life

Dear Charlie | Toddler Adventures 1.0

Friday 26th May 2017

The day started in the usual way, Mummy came in to your room at 7:15am to be greeted by you bouncing up and down in your cot, you then proceeded to throw your dummy across the room – the definitive signal that you are ready to get out of bed and start the day. After lots of “ooohs” and “aaaaahs”, which have also become a customary part of the morning routine since I decorated your room with lots of new additions for you to marvel at; we eventually changed your nappy, put on our slippers and made it downstairs.

The first job is one that you have adopted as your sole responsibility – feeding Alan (our Springer Spaniel whom you love). Mummy watches on as you scoop far too many biscuits into, and around, Alan’s bowl, whilst shoving your hand in them shouting “bik-kits”, before you point at Alan and demand a “awe”. Then it’s coffee in the pot, water in your cup, dry cheerios in your bowl and on with Channel 5’s Milkshake, so that Mummy can have just 10 minutes to enjoy her coffee and begin to gather herself for the day ahead.

Breakfast out of the way, its time to get faces washed, teeth brushed (and tongues, which you strangely love), clothes on and make-up done (Mummy, not you – although you do enjoy playing with the makeup).

This morning Mummy is being brave and taking you along to a meeting with a representative from Yorkshire Sport Foundation. Mummy is a volunteer for their Mum’s Team project which aims to get Mums active. The plan is to get to Costa coffee early and get you settled in with your snacks and toy cars before he arrives. Mummy explains to you that a man is going to come and sit at the table with us – not sure if you understood but Mummy thought it best to at least try and prepare you – it could go one of two ways. Luckily you barely batted an eyelid when he came to sit down, Mummy can definitely see your confidence building with new people. The meeting went well, Mummy had to wear a microphone for the interview, and luckily those parts where Mummy had to say to you “don’t press that” (you were playing with her phone, perhaps as a bribe to stay quiet…..) and “do you want another biscuit” were to be edited out.

Meeting wrapped up and its only 11am so it’s off to Go Bounce Trampoline Park to meet friends. Unfortunately the first 20 minutes were spent trying to calm you down when you went completely berserk because Mummy took her phone off you (naughty Mummy – that will teach her to use it as a bribe). Along with tears you produced the BIGGEST BOGIE Mummy had ever seen, which she had to put in her pocket because she had absolutely nowhere else to put it!!!! Then a nice Go Bounce employee came over with toys and other distractions, and after a short time of you being set on not enjoying yourself or even entertaining the idea of bouncing, the phone was forgotten about and a smile returned to your face. You loved bouncing as you always do, in fact you bounced so much that 10 minutes before we had to leave you managed to bounce out a gigantic poo. Mummy was dreading taking you to the changing rooms (Mummy avoids those at all costs if possible due to previous meltdowns), but you were a little star, you remained calm and happy, and even said “bye bye poo” when we flushed it down the toilet (something the Health Visitor suggested to prepare you for potty training). In fact, you continued to shout “bye bye poo” when we were back out in the entrance foyer, much to the amusement of staff and other parents.

Along with tears you produced the BIGGEST BOGIE Mummy had ever seen, which she had to put in her pocket because she had absolutely nowhere else to put it!!!!


By now it’s midday, both Mummy and Charlie are pretty hungry, so when Mummy’s friend asks if we would like to go for lunch, she agrees. Mummy is a keen budgeter – meaning she sets a budget for each week to spend on food, petrol and other bits and bobs. Mummy tries to keep lunch dates and eating out to a minimum but, every once in a while doesn’t hurt, and besides, Mummy was always so envious of other Mummy’s she would see out having lunch dates, it’s her turn! When we arrive at the café there is a bright green Lamborghini parked outside – always looking for funny photo opportunities, Mummy scrambles in her bag for your sunglasses, then proceeds to make you stand in a parking space with the Lambo behind you for a quick snap (slightly irresponsible behaviour in a car park but we got the picture and you didn’t get knocked down).


In fact, you continued to shout “bye bye poo” when we were back out in the entrance foyer, much to the amusement of staff and other parents.

Your lunch consists of cheese sandwiches in a container made to look like a ladybird (?), Tyrell’s crisps and a strawberry Go Ahead bar. Just as you are almost finished with your sandwiches Mummy thinks “Shhhh******t!!! It’s on wholemeal bread!!! Charlie’s tummy can’t handle wholemeal – it gives him stomach cramps!!!” Too late now – stupid Mummy – the second parenting fail of the day! Besides the baked goods faux par, lunch goes well but has to be wrapped up pretty quickly because it’s nap time for you and you’re starting to get a little…..difficult. Mummy just wants to nip in to Matalan as she hears they have some lovely toddler clothes; the recent hot weather has taken her by surprise and you have hardly any summer clothes.


Mummy thinks “Shhhh******t!!! It’s on wholemeal bread!!!

It starts off well, you are quite co-operative and take an interest in the clothes Mummy is looking at, but then you quickly develop your own shopping agenda – which was to stroke, smack and pull off the hangers any clothes at your eye level – with particular focus on a blue t-shirt which you just would not be prized away from (even though Mummy had selected this t-shirt in your size and had it hanging off her ring finger with numerous other garments). In the end Mummy had to carry you to the tills, which were conveniently located right at the BACK of the store – thanks Matalan! All items paid for, it was then a whole new battle getting you OUT of the shop because you refused to be carried, then you found an end display of random tat AKA all sorts of Paw Patrol and princess themed novelty items. After a few more tears you eventually did what Mummy asked and put the glittery pink Princess bouncy ball back where you found it and we headed for the car.

Seeing that Mummy was in a bit of a flap (understatement), the nice lady gave her the drink for free

At the car Mummy took her phone out of her pocket (big mistake), which you then spotted and would not get in the car unless you were holding the phone, so, silly Mummy gave in and let you hold it, only to have to take it back off you before setting off (in case you dialled 999 whilst Mummy was otherwise distracted with driving). This of course caused yet more tears, but 2 minutes in to the car journey you were snoring blissfully. Mummy saw this as a perfect opportunity to nip in to the Costa drive thru for a coffee which she could park up and enjoy whilst you had some shut-eye. After ordering her usual, skinny cappuccino WITH chocolate sprinkles, to her horror Mummy discovered that her bank card was missing! She had last used it in Matalan but there had been a few flappy moments from her since then. Maybe it had fallen out in her bag or down the back of the car seat? Nope! Mummy had to explain to the Costa lady that although she had made the coffee, Mummy didn’t have any way of paying 😦 Seeing that Mummy was in a bit of a flap (understatement), the nice lady gave her the drink for free and sent her on her way to find her bank card.

Unfortunately the bank card was in fact lost; after ringing the bank and cancelling the card, Mummy rang Matalan and discovered that it had been found in the car park and handed in. So Mummy drove all the way back to collect it. And throughout that frantic hour between leaving and returning to Matalan, you remained blissfully unaware and in the land of nod.

And that was our eventful Friday – not exactly what a “typical” day would look like, but there are certainly more mishaps and adventures since you came in to Mummy’s life, and with each day she is learning to cherish the good times, and to embrace and laugh about the more challenging times.



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